Real life and social medias

I have been held hostage by social medias and TV....I'm struggling to be free...still.

Don't get wrong, I like using FB, Twitter and Instagram (IG) as means to connect with friends and make new friends. After all, I did say few years back that I wanna make new friends every month. Lately, IG has taken a lot of my time and I am rather addicted to it. The simplicity of the settings and the fact that it allows me to follow whoever I want, makes it so inviting and keeps me on it more often than I should. Imagine following famous actors/actresses, models, corporate figures, politicians and etc where you get to see some insight, albeit true or not, into their lives. This also holds true for friends or new friends which we make either in real life or via social media. With that you get to see certain things which you may or may not agree or approve of. Then again, who are we to judge??!! I know I try not to.... However, they are those out there who don't think so...and actually think it is their rights to pass comment and let their feelings known.  For me, I find 'Delete' function very useful in dealing with this matter.

We have almost 7billion people in this planet with different race, religion, belief, colour, language, looks etc. Even in Malaysia, we have people from different culture and religion not to mention background and belief system. My Country as how I was brought and grew up on was way different as  how it is these days. I find that people are less tolerant and more prejudice towards other races, religions and even social backgrounds. It it more prevalent in our society today. Malays, I am one, are more divided than ever. We are quick to 'assess' others 'holiness' by mere outlook and shamelessly and openly judge others for difference in view and belief, and also others take on life, as a whole. Freedom to simply 'be' is slowly but surely taken from us because they believe that others should behave and do what they deem 'normal'.
Sadly, social media has been used as platform to enforce their views on others, the 'non-comformists'. Well, I am among the 'others', the 'non-comformists' or any other names they may throw at us. RESPECT is key....and that, for sure, is what seems lacking. 

6 Days in Chiangmai

Recently, I spent almost a week in Chiangmai. Was there with an old friend and 2 new friends. Shared a room with one of the new friend and found myself talking about mental and emotional calmness over that few days. The old friend and one of the new friend are sisters whom silence will only be found when they are both asleep...which was much needed especially after spending the whole day together. During the entire trip, they visited more temples and religious related buildings small/big more than i did in my entire lifetime combined, and as of last sunday, 5June, i am not that young..LOL. So, you see, they did a lot of visits.

my roommate and i decided to take a more laid back approach by going for walks, massages and hairwash, and lots and lots of coffee breaks, and talked about important things like relationship and life in general. somehow, that managed to lead me into talking about my past experiences (always claimed i had the 'most' among friends especially when relationships are concerned) and how yoga has changed my outlook on work, family&friends, love and living in general.
she complained about having migraine, gastritis and sinus which stress is the common factor. i told her that i used to have all that because of stress at work. she looked a bit puzzled. now, i don't know why people seemed to assume that i've must been a yoga instructor all my adult life and failed to see why i 1.would understand anything about stress at work (how stressful can it be to teach yoga really??? 2. being a yogi with so much 'zen'ness cultivated over the years, stress managed to creep into my 'peaceful' life. but seriously??? Then, i felt compelled to explain rather briefly that i studied accounting in uni, graduated, worked in accounting firm for 5 long years where my youth was basically robbed if not stolen! And proceed to mention the rest of my work history...not a short one, i dare say.
you see, i can relate to a lot of my students and friends and whoever who wanna talk about all the happenings in their lives...well, almost anything...because at this stage of my life, I have been there and done that! i am comfortable of who i am and what i am.

Everyday, I strive to be a better friend, better instructor, better yogi, better sister, better daughter, better wife, better listener, better reader, better blogger, better twitter, better runner, better eater, better tennis player, better squash player, and in general, a better ME.

To leave or to stay...how many times is enough?

A friend called this afternoon and said that she wanted to talk. So, there i was sitting on the edge of my bed with my towel for next one hour and ten minutes listening to her...talk.

why do people change? she asked. i said because they can. yes, but what if the changes affect others in bad way? she asked. probably, they don't realise that or simply don't care, was my reply. i used to hear people saying that once you get married, it will go downhill from there. i used to think that the reason that happened because of neglect by both parties and hence, started to take things for granted. the truth of the matter is, relationship/marriage will fail when one party decided not to care anymore or found other person/thing to care about. the only thing the other party can do is to fight for the relationship/marriage and maybe, just maybe, it will stay.
the problem is, the desire to fight is weak or no longer there due to reasons or hurt in the past. two things will happen at this juncture....1. you stay on and suffer...2. you leave. simple? not quite....never is. either one, the hurt will be unbearable. but if you decides to leave, your shot at happiness is higher....your hurt will be shorter....you will be a better and happier person to your siblings, friends, parents, colleagues and etc...you get my drift. staying...why on earth do you wanna do that? i asked. need to think of my kids, she answered. the talk ends till next revelation. i stood up and walked to shower. while feeling the cold water on my face i thought.....why we do this to ourselves and our children again and again?!

soul at peace

this morning, i told a friend over coffee that a soul can only have one resting place at a time. she didn't look at all puzzled as if truly understood every word i said. of course, there was a long talk (me alone) about how unsettling it is for me, the feeling i've been having since i got back from india. i'm not one who likes to whine about things. although i was confined to a room during my stay, i felt somewhat at ease despite having very limited access to things, in general. somehow, i was 'settled' and content, it seemed like my soul belonged there. she said it's the yoga that makes me feel that way. the more you look 'inside' yourself, more things being revealed...you grow more quiet as more thoughts come into being. and with more practise, the mind, too, will grow quiet. hopefully, by then, the soul has found a resting place....while i'm still breathing.

yogi is just another being, too...

they said the person who can hurt you the most is the one closest to you. so, he or she did and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it?! i believe so. if it is someone who is close and we tend to have many of those around us, things get easier. we can just make a conscious effort to spend less time with these people or better still...slowly but surely try to have less and less things to do with them until one fine day, they'll get the message.

the thing with those really close to us, things get difficult. subtlety is the word..in malay we have a saying, "menarik benang dalam tepung...benang tak putus, tepung tak berselerak" means pulling a thread in flour (direct translation, that is) so that both thread and flour are intact. in life, however, that is not always the case. for me, when that happens, i revert back to few things i always revert back in such situation...nothing can hurt me unless i allow it...or..let it go, don't hold on to negative words...or i am what i am, who cares what they say. the problem with that is, things don't hurt too much if it was done by someone else...someone whom you think ought to know you well enough and yet could say the most 'unpleasant' things, your heart does rattles eventhough just a little...you think, how could he or she said that? but they did. i say, take a deep breath, dig deep into your heart and gather all your strength, smile, nod and quietly retires to your thoughts, positive thoughts about your dreams, your plans for tomorrow and, hold out your hands and thank THE ALMIGHTY for all his blessings. finally, say your prayer and retire to bed, early, because tomorrow, there will be a whole new day ahead of us.